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Which romantic blunder did your temperament trigger?

Laraine Bennett

Photo by Bobby Mikul

Which of these romantic blunders are you most likely to make? If you know your temperament, you may be able to guess.
 

The commando

Are you a can-do choleric?  If you are choleric, you are likely to be blunt, forthright, and take charge. You like to make the plans, call the shots, and have the last word. On your first date, you are charming, quick-witted, and confident.

But you can be too demanding, too intense. The romantic mistake you are likely to make is being too controlling or moving too quickly for your partner. You may want to get a commitment or plan the wedding too soon  or be the one who decides how many kids you will have and where you will live.
 

The idealist

If you are a melancholic, you are serious, sensitive, and romantic. But your date might not even realize you’re interested in him! You tend to be more aware of your internal feelings than you are capable of conveying them. You tend to under-react or over-react.

You are daydreaming about the wedding, the dress, the honeymoon and the children, but you didn’t catch on that your date just wasn’t that into you.

Melancholics tend to miss the obvious social cues. They either act disinterested (appearing cool and aloof) or they go over the top, making their partner feel awkward. They say “I love you” too soon or they don’t say anything at all.

The melancholic ruminates over every conversation, worries about every unintended glance. The melancholic blunder: living in your dreams, you misread reality.


The butterfly

Sanguines just want to have fun. They can keep this up for a long time. They forget important occasions, don’t return phone calls, and like to keep things light. If you are a sanguine, you are spontaneous and funny, a fun and exciting date.

Although you are generous and demonstrative in the moment, your mercurial temperament can quickly move from hot to cold. You can unintentionally mislead with your charming, flirtatious manner. You bite off more than you can chew and leave a string of failed relationships behind you. Your mistake is under-committing, being eternally playful, always seeking the greener grass.
 

The good friend

If you are a phlegmatic, you are calm, easy-going, and level-headed. You are the guy (or gal) everyone likes. Never flashy, pushy, or the center of attention, you are humble and selfless. You are faithful, solid, commitment oriented.

Your romantic error is to wait too long, to fail to be assertive when necessary, and thereby miss out on an opportunity to find your true love.
 

Do any of these romantic blunders ring true for you?

Of course, making mistakes is part of single life (and the human condition). And so often it is through our errors that we learn what we really want, who we really are, and what we ought to do.

As Shakespeare said, “The course of true love never did run smooth.”

This article originally appeared on Catholic Match.com, which is a part of the 4marks Network. 4marks offers a variety of online services to Catholics, including our Temperament Test, single Catholic service and Trivia. To learn more about any of our services or how 4marks is helping Catholics connect online in order to deepen their faith offline visit www.4marks.com.

Topics: Relationships

Laraine Bennett co-authored, with her husband Art, The Temperament God Gave Your Spouse and The Temperament God Gave You, published by Sophia Institute Press. Their new book, The Emotions God Gave You, is due Spring 2011. Please visit their website at http://temperaments.sophiainstitute.com/.

View all articles by Laraine Bennett

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