Viewpoint How priests and deacons should not give homilies

Fr. John. J. Conley, S. J., a professor of theology and philosophy at Loyola University Maryland in Baltimore, recently penned an article for the Jesuit periodical America entitled, “How Not to Preach.”

Fr. Conley identifies himself “as a veteran of 60 years in the pews and 30 years in the pulpit.” His description of Catholic preaching is both amusing and disturbing. He sets out three dangers that homilists need to avoid.

1. The homily is all about you, the priest. “Keep the sermon strictly autobiographical. Your congregation is dying to know all about your last vacation. There’s no need to deal with that pesky reading about Abraham and Isaac and the knife.”

Fr. Conley describes a homily he recently heard about the priest’s socks! “Father explained how difficult it is to keep pairs of socks together. He noted his preferred detergent for washing socks and the advantages of using a clothesline over a dryer, He said there was a controversy over whether priests should wear all-black socks or whether they could add stripes”--which was news to Fr. Conley.

“We kept waiting for the spiritual punch line. Was the lost sock like the lost sheep in the parable of the Good Shepherd? It remained a mystery. The sermon concluded with the revelation that [the homilist] found doing the laundry difficult at times.”

Fr. Conley continues: “On a darker note, I once heard a sermon in which the preacher discussed the problem of resentment. The theme matched the Gospel, which featured the apostles’ jealous squabbling among themselves. Warming to his subject, the preacher described his own resentment against his brother (the prize-winning athlete), his sixth-grade teacher (too critical) and then his dear mother (too distant). As we cringed into our missalettes, I wondered if Doctor Phil would rush from the sacristy to take over the bathos in the sanctuary.”

Fr. Conley states: “You were not ordained to tell your own story. You were ordained to tell someone else’s.”

2. Rely on the Holy Spirit. There’s no need to prepare.  “One of the popular homiletic genres these days is the Magellan sermon. In the space of 20 minutes, the congregation is treated to a tour of the world as the preacher unloads a catalogue of random, unrelated thoughts. In one recent Magellan improvisation, we learned that Samuel heard a noise like a whisper, that we should be patient with the hearing-impaired, that the turnout for the Christmas bazaar was just great (applause), that recent events in the Middle East are disturbing and that we should be careful about what we post on Facebook. And, oh, there’s a mistake in the bulletin. The second collection will be taken up today for our music ministry, not for scholarships for the grade school.”

3. Keep the sermon light.  “Always prefer the sentimental to the doctrinal. Don’t bother the congregation with such complications as the Atonement. Keep it beige and soothing.”

Fr. Conley desecribes an Easter homily in a packed church. “The preacher began by telling us that Christian hope means ‘Tomorrow will always be more beautiful than today.’ We waited for the theological development. The resurrection of the body? Immortality? The last judgment? We received only more of the same magical thinking, closer to Hallmark Cards than to the Gospel according to St. Luke we had just heard.”

Can readers relate to this? How true a picture is it? Have you heard homilies like these? Is Fr. Conley exaggerating, or over-generalizing?

Just asking …!

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